I’m currently studying through Isaiah. I have only made it to chapter four, because there is a gargantuan amount of humanity to dive into. It is dark and terrifying, and a little too real. I want to skip ahead to the part where God’s people are rescued and redeemed. I want to read the words that tell of His people tasting the sweetness of grace and exchanging their pain for His joy. But I know that I have to linger in the moments of running and idol-worshipping for a moment longer, because I am walking the same journey. I have to understand where I am in order to understand why He doesn’t want me to be there.

As I study through the mistakes that God’s people have made, I find myself astonished by their reckless ignorance toward His obvious offer of freedom. Then… I find myself realizing that I do the same thing. There is a trying moment of, “Oh, I see how easy it was for them to worship those idols. I see how easy it was for them to choose counterfeit satisfaction instead of choosing the author of true satisfaction.”

Isaiah 1:12 stands out to me. “When you come to appear before me, who has required of you this trampling of my courts?” It is here that I can almost feel the rumbling of God’s voice. He asks His people a question that there cannot possibly be an answer to. No one has asked for this. One day, or maybe little by little, His people decided to trample on His grace instead of embrace it. He goes on to list some of the things that are an abomination to Him. Things we brought to Him with no effort or change of heart. Counterfeit things.

Then there is Isaiah 1:18. “Come now, let us reason together, says the Lord: though your sins are like scarlet, they shall be as white as snow.” If this doesn’t bring you to your knees, I don’t know what will. We can begin to feel His heart soften. Or maybe our eyes are just being opened to the heart that He has always had for us. He offers peace. He offers to throw our sins away. But we stay where we are, sealed into the concrete structures that we worship.

And Isaiah 2:5, a plea from the prophet: “O house of Jacob, come, let us walk in the light of the Lord.” I have been skimming over the words of offering and freedom that the Lord gives in these first chapters of Isaiah, looking for something within His promises that meant harm or pain or death. There is nothing. God clearly reveals that what He offers is life, rest and abundance. Yet there are so many words of grief and pain in these chapters. Because that’s what we keep turning to. Grief and pain.

My prayer is that we would recognize the difference between the voice of our Father and the voice of our pain. They are not the same. Seems simple, but it’s not. The voice of our Father is not the voice of our pain. I pray that we would all recognize with a little bit of bravery and humility the places that we have ended up, so that we might run into His arms.

As I journey onward through Isaiah, I would love to hear your thoughts on moving closer to the true heart of God. How can we really hear His voice amidst the chaos of regret, trial and confusion?

May peace abound in you.

Rachel